SATURDAY, JULY 23, 2022
Meet at Dock 4:30 pm
Booze Cruise 5:00-8:00 pm
Sheraton Marina, across from SAN airport
AOLANI CATAMARAN SAILING
1380 Harbor Island Dr
Shake your buoy baby, I’m turning 40!!
Welcome aboard Aolani Charters, for a 3 hour tour of the bay! Join me on a sexy catamaran, and sail into the San Diego sunset.
<< THIS INVITE IS FOR YOU ONLY >>
Catered Hawaiian food will be hosted, however alcohol can be bought a la carte for only $7-9 each! (Cocktails, hard seltzers, beer & wine. Cash preferred, cards accepted) If you have any dietary restrictions, bring a little snacky poo to hold you down. Personal alcohol is not allowed. The boat crew will not admit you onboard if you appear intoxicated. Keep it together.
PARTY THEME: HBO’s Euphoria (TV series)
ATTIRE: Sexy Y2K Fashun – bright colors, metallic, iridescent, bling, mesh, cut outs, HOE SHIT!! Think nightclurb/music festival/rave outfits. With layers for the breeze at sundown. I’ll try to bring extra pieces & accessories if you wanna play dress up! Non-slip sandals or shoes; stacked heels should be okay, esp down at the interior salon of the boat, so bring ’em if you want to complete your outfit for pics. Don’t forget to top off with sparkly makeup lewks too! When in doubt or feeling lame to participate full out, just dress colorful please.
**Arrive in some kind of cover up or robe, then reveal your inner Di’Lovely once we’re on the boat!
BRING: Drank money, phone strap or pop socket, our best memory together, your alternate party ego, dat phat ass, and body rolls!
PLEASE LEAVE: your kids at home and your inhibitions at the dock. I have carefully handpicked this bad bitch roster of goofy humans who can get along with other silly hoes. If there’s any time to wild tf out with no judgment… it is for my ridiculous party.
Get excited! We gonna party like it’s 1999!
• TEXT ME for the Apple Maps pin drop!
Spanish Landing Park East (LOT):
3752 Harbor Dr, San Diego, CA 92101
Sheraton San Diego Hotel & Marina (DOCK):
1380 Harbor Island Dr, San Diego, CA 92101
• RECOMMENDED PARKING: Public parking is available northwest of the marina’s dock entrance. Access through the “Spanish Landing Park” entrance located on Harbor Drive. Rates are $1/hr with a 4-hr maximum time limit. If you turn left into this lot, turn left again and park at the end. From there, it’s a 3-min walk to the dock entrance.
**Don’t forget your parking receipt at the kiosk, to leave on your dashboard before leaving your vehicle. This lot closes at 10:30 pm daily.
– The Sheraton Hotel offers paid parking for non-guests starting at $18, and increases depending on how many hours you stay.
– There may be free street parking nearby. Let me drive by soon to check. BRB on that!
– Or just have ya man drop you off. Tell him to pick you up around 8:30 pm
• WALK TO THE MARINA and look for the Big Blue Chair (you’ll know when you see it). Once the entire party is complete (I promise I won’t be late), a crewmember will escort us to Aolani’s dock. Then we can strip down to our hoe ‘fits, get the Captain’s safety briefing, and then we partyyy!!!
• What if I get seasick?
If you usually do, please take some (Meclizine/Dramamine) motion sickness meds at 4:00-4:30 pm (30-60 minutes prior to our trip). Ooh honey, I fucking love you for being so down to power through… “Bitch, you’re my soulmate.”
Just for some reassurance, catamarans are known for their stability. The two hulls are 32 feet apart, giving good width to the base of the boat, and designed to slice through waves rather than bouncing over them like most sailboats. Therefore, your experience aboard should be smooth, stable, and comfortable!
• Is there a cover charge?
Nope! I gotchu but if you had a faaabulous time and feel inclined to contribute, I won’t turn down any help so I can tip the boat crew!
• What do you want for your birthday?
Girl, please just show up and show tf ooouuuuttt!!
• Why can’t I take my spouse?
Because I didn’t invite him.
There will be a handful of husbands onboard, but these are dudes I interact/party with on a regular basis. They’re friends of mine, so clearly they won’t judge us for being obnoxious. Plus, we’ll have personal photographers. Duh!
• Can I bring my own alcohol?
Again, no. Per Aolani’s rules. Ahem…Tiffany.
• Can I buy you a drink, shawty?
Maybe. I really don’t want to black out and miss my own party. Been there, done that.
• Will we be jumping in the water?
Nah. We do have the option of anchoring down to jump in but only before alcohol is served, per safety precautions. Knowing us, we’ll want to drink immediately and keep our makeup on.
• How’s the weather?
I’m guessing it will be a nice 73°-80° but it may feel cooler with the ocean breeze. Aolani does have blankets and jackets to lend if needed.
• What is Euphoria?
Only the dopest show ever, and best inspo to the party’s dress theme! At first I just wanted y’all to slut the fuck up, but this show is such a fantastic visual explanation. I hope creating your lewk brings back high school memories, but we can make it far better now that we have such great tits, ass, and eyebrows! Feel free to google/pinterest some outfits, and text me about it! Come over if you need some styling help; we can put together something you’ll still be comfortable in.
Shout out to genius Paulina for coining “euFORTYa!!”
• Is there a private space to change clothes or store my belongings?
Yes! In addition to the main interior salon, there are 4 bedrooms and 2 restrooms!
• Can I leave the party early?
“Bitch, you better be joking.”
• Are you having any festivities on land?
Possibly, but nothing’s planned. It depends how we lolas feel collectively, after the boat party. It’s also tough because it is Comic-Con weekend. It would be great to hit up downtown in our “Euphoria costumes.” Let me know if you have any suggestions!
• Okay, but like, when is your actual birthday?
Monday, July 25
Leo sun, Libra moon, Pisces rising. Does that explain a lot?
Thanks Bestie, I can’t wait to party with you soon!! XOXO